Thursday, June 08, 2006

DTR (Define The Relationship)

I hate DTRs. I hate that nervous feeling you get thinking about it. I hate the fact that the girl may not like me, so I am laying my heart on the table only to hand her a mallet and let her whack away. They aren't fun. But, there is the always the hope that the girl will like me. And it is that hope that pushes me through the fear of rejection to take the chance.

But, what I hate even more than DTRs is the UN-DTR. Technically, it is still a DTR, but I am calling it the UN-DTR, because, this is the one in which you have to tell the girl you don't like her and that you are just friends. This sucks on multiple levels. First, there is no hope of having a girlfriend after this. Second, there exists the possiblity that you will break someones heart. Third, there exists the possibility that all of her friends will hate you, therefore taking an entire segment of the female population beyond future option for you. Finally, it sucks, because you may be killing (or making awkward-which is basically the same thing, right?) a good friendship.

Well, I had to have an UN-DTR a couple days ago. It was with one of my best girl friends here in the Czech. I hated that I had to do it. The great thing about it is that it was born not out of her heart, but out of others around her. Everyone was talking about it, but no one was talking to us. Americans, Czechs...I even heard that Kofi Annan called a special session of the UN to discuss it. The only way both of us heard about it is through our friends. She said what put a lot of people over the edge was when I gave her a side-hug while we were standing up in front at our national conference.*

Having a girlfriend gives you protection. I could basically do anything I wanted and girls knew I was taken. But now that I am single, it is different. I haven't treated this girl any different, hung out with her any more, but because I am single now everyone thinks there is something with us! Suck.

So, we talked. Everything is cool. Our friendship is good. No awkwardness.

So, the UN-DTR is over. I'm glad. I just hope the next DTR has some hope for a relationship...

*Note to self: Don't hug, touch, smile, or look at a girl while standing in front of a room of Czechs.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

first:that might be one of the longest comments i've ever seen! eprops to enriqueta.

second:hang in there... i empathise. how long must we continue on so misunderstood. reminds me of talking to you over thanksgiving conference. keep on keepin on pal... ;) with or without your 'dtr's.

third:dread update?

forth: found a website that is my christmas gift to you. http://pandora.com/
merry christmas. if you are anything like me this will make your heart happy... and i think you are. have fun finding new treasures.